Traditions are stories and practices handed down through generations, often steeped in symbolism and history. Wedding Traditions, in particular, have traveled across centuries, bringing with them cherished rituals like rings, veils, and grand celebrations. But as times change, it’s worth asking:
“Do we really need this? Why are we doing this? Does this tradition reflect *us*?”
For many, weddings are seen as a sequence of traditions, one seamlessly following another. And they’re not wrong—weddings themselves are a tradition, rich in ritual and symbolism. But what makes these traditions meaningful is their connection to the people they represent.
It’s important to pause and consider where these traditions come from, as many are rooted in historical contexts that may not align with modern values.
To have and to hold—or to let go and make your own rules?
Photo: Dee & Jo’s Wedding
1. Walking Down The Aisle
Walking down the aisle traces back to a time when women were viewed very differently in society. Today, this tradition can take on new meaning, symbolizing love, unity, or family connections.
Whether you walk solo, with both parents, or together as a couple, make this moment uniquely yours. Alternatively, consider greeting your guests alongside your partner before the ceremony—a modern twist that sets a welcoming tone.
2. The Wedding Dress
Who decided wedding dresses must be white, paired with perfectly styled up-dos and polished shoes? Who says your partner must wear a black suit and clean shave? Embracing your individuality on your wedding day deepens its meaning, making it truly your own. So, if you’re a sneakers-and-black-gown kind of couple, lean into it. After all, authenticity never goes out of style.
3. Bridal Party
Selecting a bridal party can be tricky, especially when you want to include all your closest friends. Add the cost of outfits worn for just one day, and it’s easy to see why some couples reconsider.
Historically, this tradition stemmed from a superstition that brides needed protection from evil spirits—so attendants were there to confuse them! Today, your bridal party can be as big or small as you wish—or skipped entirely if it doesn’t feel right for you.
4. The Church
If religion isn’t a central part of your life, why feel obligated to marry in a church? Modern weddings offer the freedom to say “I do” in places that hold personal significance—whether it’s a mountaintop, beach, or backyard.
Consider your officiant, too. Choosing someone who knows your love story can add a deeply personal touch, as can inviting loved ones to share wisdom and blessings during your ceremony.
5. The Veil
Veils trace back to a time when arranged marriages were common, and grooms often didn’t see their brides until the ceremony. Families feared that if the bride’s appearance displeased the groom, he might refuse to marry her.
Early Greek and Roman brides also wore brightly coloured veils to ward off evil spirits. Today, veils are purely aesthetic—so if they don’t resonate with you, why not opt for a floral crown, headband, or go bare-headed?
6. The Bouquet Toss
In ancient times, brides were considered symbols of good luck, and guests would sometimes rip pieces of their dresses as souvenirs. To avoid this chaos, the bouquet toss emerged as a way to share luck without losing part of the outfit! If this tradition feels outdated, you can replace it with something meaningful, like gifting your bouquet to a loved one or skipping it entirely.
7. The First Dance
If dancing isn’t your thing, why make it a centerpiece of your day? An awkward first dance can feel more stressful than romantic. Instead, consider a simple slow dance or skip the tradition altogether. The important thing is to create a moment that feels natural and meaningful to you both.
8. Wedding Cake
In ancient Rome, wedding cakes made of wheat or barley were broken over the bride’s head to symbolise fertility, and guests scrambled for crumbs as tokens of good luck. Later, during King Charles II’s reign, icing transformed the humble cake into the tiered confections we know today.
While modern cakes symbolise prosperity and commitment, some couples are swapping them for dessert bars, donut walls, or even savoury alternatives. Choose whatever feels sweet (or savoury!) to you.
As you navigate the many traditions associated with weddings, remember that this day is ultimately about your love story. By thoughtfully choosing which customs to embrace, adapt, or leave behind, you can create a celebration that’s as unique and meaningful as your relationship. Whether you hold on to the old or pave the way for something new, make it authentically yours.